T.I.L.T. Things I've Learned Thursday

Welcome to Things I've Learned Thursday, a potential new regular feature here at the Nexus! As we get older, it becomes harder to learn new things, and I dread the day when I stop completely. We're constantly bombarded with new information and new experiences, of varying degrees of importance. For now I'll look back on recent discoveries, though future installments may share wisdom from further back. By “wisdom” I no doubt mean pop culture minutia and things that are common sense to normal people. Let's begin, shall we?

* In the grand scheme of things, Stargate SG-1 turned out to be everything Enterprise failed to be, and over ten years showed humanity’s logical progression in weapons and technology following contact with various advanced alien races. I've yet to finish the tenth season as well as the direct-to-DVD film sequels, so I may elaborate more on this topic at some point in the future.

* Chasing artificial cheese dip from Taco Bell with a Grande Mocha Frappuccino from Starbucks can cause quite the headache, especially as a method of falling hard from the healthier eating wagon.

* Grande Mocha Frappuccinos are still as awesome as I remembered.

* The odds of slurping whipped cream loudly from a straw at the exact instant you round the corner of a building in a seemingly empty parking lot and nearly collide with a female coworker increase from 2% to 100% if you're me.

* A young Jeff Goldblum played “Freak #1” in the original Death Wish, one of the thugs that violates Charles Bronson's daughter. Apparently some of his baser lines of dialogue appear regularly on the uncensored satellite radio edition of Opie and Anthony.

* Hillary Clinton is SIXTY.

* Charles Bronson was the MAN. I first learned this years ago when I saw Murphy's Law for the first time, was reminded in the last few years with such films as Once Upon a Time in the West and The Magnificent Seven, and was reminded yet again when I watched Death Wish on Wednesday evening.

* I suspect The Brave One, like so many vigilante movies, was strongly influenced by the original Death Wish. By “strongly influenced” I mean “wisely used it as a rough blueprint”.

* If changing the specifications of a letter or label that must appear through the window of a reply envelope customers are asked to return, always mock up the new designs to make sure everything still lines up with the window and has the adequate .25” clearance.

* The phrase ”A woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle” actually predates U2's “Tryin' to Throw Your Arms Around the World” and was coined by Irina Dunn in 1970, not by Gloria Steinem as most people thought(or by Bono as I thought).

* I've been with my new company nearly a year now, and only discovered the other day that we have a conference room “G”. I have many fond memories of the “G” and “H” at my old job, as the wall between them collapsed to create a giant room often used for office parties. My new “G” is located in the heart of our marketing department near some steam pipes and is very cramped, though there are some interesting pieces of original autographed baseball memorabilia on the walls. My favorite conference room where we have most of our meetings is “B”, not far from my office, which is a giant air conditioned room with warm lighting and a sprawling glass table, as well as a folding wall it shares with conference room “A”, which has a giant wooden table and a projector built into the ceiling. Therefore, “A” and “B” are my new and improved “G” and “H” while my new “G” doesn't compare to the old one. Don't get me started on subway lines...

* Clancy Brown learned ancient Nordic for his role in Pathfinder. Clancy Brown sounds like a great villain in any language.

* Coming in 2009: a new Death Wish? Reportedly, Stallone is working on it...will it be too over the top? Should this project ever see daylight? Surely it couldn't win an Oscar! Should he stop, or my mom will shoot? We'll end on this cliffhanger...

And so, as of this Thursday, these are some things that I've learned. What do you think?