Italians on the Streets

It's that time of year again, when feast season shifts into high gear! Italians around the world gather to light candles, sing songs, play music, and push random statues of various saints through the streets where they live. In America, these traditions tend to be strongest in neighborhoods where the old ways have been preserved. Despite my own Italian Catholic upbringing, I don't think I would be as aware of these events if not for my music. For me, they're just gigs, a way of making a few extra bucks while maintaining my hobby and one of my few talents. It means so much more to the crowds clamoring to touch the statue or take pictures of it, though from time to time the band does get recognition, and even a single “Very nice!” after a song is much appreciated.

We took on a new gig this year, which was technically an old one. The family that owns the statue and sponsors it moved from Brooklyn to Queens a few years back. I found the place easily enough, amazed by the street views Google™ now offers. Holograms are just around the corner, and I don't mean Jem's backup singers. I often wonder what people in some of these neighborhoods must think when they suddenly see flashing police lights and hear a brass band blasting outside their window at 8:00 on a Wednesday night. Still, good spirits are contagious.

Our snare drummer, the band leader's son, had his wife and 8 month old daughter with him. The bass drummer couldn't resist kneeling beside her stroller and beating off a bouncy rhythm, which everyone thought was really cute and not at all disturbing or dangerous to small eardrums. Later, when the procession was over, the mother would dangle the child inches from her father as he played a furious solo in the middle of the theme to Rocky. It actually made for a very cute picture that brought a smile to my face, but I was concerned that they were a little too close to the blur that was her daddy's drumsticks. But if the child retains her hearing, she may have a future in the family business.

Animals definitely weren't as fond of us as infants and old Italians. A woman cradled the tiniest kitten to her shoulder, and finally brought it inside when the drums began. Along the way, there was the occasional startled dog, and one boxer in particular came very close to dragging his owner into the street. She was a lot smaller than that dog and he eventually won the tug of war, thankfully after the light turned red and it was safe to cross. We finished our musical reign of terror after about an hour, which was fine for me since I have to be in Brooklyn by 8 AM on Thursday morning for another gig, followed by a return to Queens for part 2 of the job begun on Wednesday night. At this point, the band leader decided to give the crowd a few encores. I made sure to stress to both he and his son that weekday traffic wasn't going to be in my favor, to prepare them should I arrive late the next morning.

It's that time of year again. You'll hear certain music. You'll smell certain foods. And you'll know....you'll know....that my people are out there....

PBW: Return to Barto

Last year, I went on a trip with one of my bands to the Padre Pio shrine in Barto, Pennsylvania. It was our 2nd time playing in July and third trip overall, as we’d gone in October of the previous year as well, but it was the first time I brought my camera. Between songs and on breaks, I snapped away. There’s something incredibly clean, serene, and peaceful about that place. It was distressing however to learn one of the statues from the grounds was stolen, though the perpetrators were caught. This year, I brought my camera again, and even had a decent window on the bus to shoot the journey there from New York and back. We stopped at a local church for mass first, and since we were a little early I even had an opportunity to take some pictures there. And on one of my breaks, I headed over to a war memorial at the end of the block the shrine is located on. I invite you to relive my latest “day-cation” through the magic of Photo Blog Wednesday:

Clash of the Humans

We all see the world from the center of our own universe, from a perspective shared by no one else. For most of us, it takes effort to see things from another point of view, and at times we need our space. Inevitably, when you put two or more people together, conflict is inevitable. It's kind of like we're ants that God put in a jar and then shook up. Here are three recent examples:

1) During one of our breaks at our recent Padre Pio gig, our band got on line for some hot dogs and sausages. We were sent to the other side of the line, which didn't make sense since that's where the cashier and condiments were. One of the ladies taking money got annoyed with one of the guys ahead of us, who was also upset because the guy working the barbecue had sent us over. So we got back on the other end of the line, and ultimately I opted to leave completely. There was too much confusion, and I felt like I was getting in the way of the guests, who really should get food before those of us who were there in a working capacity. I was also feeling guilty taking food without paying. Our band leader told us we didn't have to, but I didn't think it would look right and I wasn't sure the cashier wouldn't expect money. In past years, we'd eaten separately from the people in a small room inside off from the kitchen.

My other concern was one of a....biological nature. Waking up at 5:30 AM, my system wasn't “ready” to use the facilities, and as I wouldn't have a non-embarassing opportunity to do so until I got home around 8 PM, I began to realize not putting more food in me before doing so was probably the smartest move. My dad being my dad, and an Italian, couldn't grasp the concept of a family member not eating. I couldn't very well explain my reasoning in front of everyone, but I came close to shouting it out. “Eat something. You better eat. I don't know why you don't want to eat. You're gonna get cramps later.” He wouldn't let it go, and for some reason got stuck on that “cramps” note, which just didn't sound right for a myriad of reasons. I tried ignoring him. At one point I'm sorry to admit to telling my old man to shut up, not that it did any good. Finally I told him I'd give him my reasons after we got home. “Okay.” he said, “You'll tell me when we get home.” There was about 15 seconds of silence after that before he had to add, “But when you get cramps later, I'm going to say I told you so.”

2) The roads are an excellent source of conflict. People are too quick to honk their horn, and most cars will count the stop of the car ahead of them at a stop sign as their stop, rolling along right on the other car's rear bumper. I often take my life in my hands when I walk at lunch, and I like to take one “teaser” step off the curb when I get a walk sign, knowing full well that the car I'm miming stepping in front of is going to run the light. I've yet to see one stop or even slow down, and if I ever did start to cross, I'd definitely get hit.

On Monday, a lady veering around a corner into a parking lot in an SUV. From my vantage point on the sidewalk along a strip mall, I could see another SUV barreling around the corner, with loud Spanish dance music blasting. It was a narrow driveway, and logically he should have veered right and used the shoulder created by painted yellow lines in front of the stores. Instead he veered left toward her, as she veered left toward me. In slow motion I watched the male driver lean out his window, shaking a fist at her, “Youuuuu F********kiiiing Moronnnnn!” A few minutes later, after the sad lack of Doritos in Subway sent me instead across the street to Dunkin' Donuts, I was startled by honking horns, and turned to see another impatient driver shoot out of a parking lot in front of an inconsiderate driver who had no intention of letting her out. Human kindness is not to be found behind the wheel, far more often than not.

3) Finally, in Dunkin' Donuts itself, I waited patiently at the counter of a seemingly empty store. The manager emerged from somewhere behind me, and leaned in to yell at the girl in the back that a customer was waiting. As she prepared my flatbread sandwich, iced tea, and hash browns, two more people arrived, and another worker emerged to take the next register. After helping the girl next to me with her beverage order, he was oddly terse with the woman that followed. “Are you sure that's the hazelnut?” she asked him, when he seemed to just grab the nearest pot of coffee and put it in a cup. He gave her the barest nod of assent before sliding the cup over, and she reached past the register and grabbed her own cardboard holder. He rang up the order and once she paid, he snarled, “And don't bring that thing in here ever again?”

“Excuse me?” she snarled back.

“That dog. The customers don't like it.”

I then noticed she had some little white poodle thing tucked under one arm.

“That's not my problem,” she said, “Do you want it to stay in the car and die?”

“Don't bring it in again.” he repeated, and she waved him off. He called the manager over and told him the story, and they chuckled grimly. The girl returned with my food and the other worker rang up my order, commiserating with me. “These people...” he said, “But if other people get upset, it is we who get blamed.” I started to echo the woman's concern about leaving the dog outside, if only to calm him down, but I quickly backpedaled as his hackles rose visibly, and modified my statement with, “...but I guess she could have left him and cracked the windows.” At that point, I'd had enough of people clashing with each other, and I definitely didn't want to clash with the people who prepare food for me each week. I found a sunny spot by the window at a small table away from humans, away from conflict, and enjoyed a meal free of stress, before it was time to walk back to the office.

Humans can complement one another but we may also clash, and I suspect life might be less interesting if it were any different.

Phantasmic Links 7.13.09

There's nothing like seven hours on a bus with loud, old Italian people. It would be very hard for me to type an impression that would do justice to the mix of gibberish, proper names, and Italian words or phrases I actually recognized. They're not yelling; it's how they talk.

Those seven hours were split into three hour and four hour segments, in between which I enjoyed a pleasant afternoon with one of my Italian bands at an annual barbecue and pilgrimage, photos of which will be coming later in the week. For now, I'm hoping the naps I took between the singing and the loud inquiries of “ESPRESSO?? DOUGHNUT? CHE SE DICE?!” will leave me rested enough to face a particularly tough work week, with three more music gigs sprinkled in. With the last ounces of remaining energy I have right now, I shall gather PHANTASMIC LINKS:

(1) These are the 7 archetypical Best Buy employees you might encounter, and as an avid patron of that store, I recognized almost every single one.
Hat Tip: J-No.

(2) What do you think of Ryan Reynolds as Green Lantern? I think it's a decent choice, although I always pictured him playing The Flash.

(3) Strong Bad RETURNS! But will every character make it through this latest episode?

(4) Animated Engines show you how various engines work, for those of you who were wondering...

(5) Some mice have been successfully genetically engineered to lose weight by exhaling, converting fat to carbon dioxide. My science fiction brain is already imagining a scenario in which things go horribly, horribly wrong when applied to humans, but I'd definitely try the product once they worked out all the potentially lethal side effects I could envision. And then, instead of sucking in my gut when I saw a pretty girl, I could just exhale it.

(6) Fancy Fast Food is fast food with a cosmetic makeover. It's still bad for you, but it sure looks fancy!

(7) There. I fixed it. Oh, really...? I kind of think the hot dog rake is a patent waiting to happen...

(8) Batman and Superman duke it out in Times Square. That stuff never happens when I'm around with my camera. Wait...MCF is never around when...nahhh, can't be.

(9) Wonder Twin Powers...ACTIVATE!! Say what you will about those characters, but that is some very cool package design.

(10) These are the Top Ten Things that Sound Cool When Spoken by a Giant Robot, specifically Peter Cullen's Optimus Prime.
H.T.: Rhodester.

(11) Do you know How to Raise a Dragon? This game will teach you, and offers several different outcomes based on a variety of variables that you'll be able to modify from any given point, once you play through all the scenarios once. Fun and “educational”.

Have a link to a game, movie, article, or anything else you think might be “phantasmic”? E-mail me and it just might appear in an upcoming PHANTASMIC LINKS!

My Sitcom Dance Sequence Five

In searching for my most memorable sitcom character moments the other day, a lot of those scenes involved music. More than a few involved dancing, and while I didn't include those the other day, I knew it wouldn't be long before I was back to compile my five favorite sitcom dance sequences:

1) Ross and Monica do “The Routine”:


2) Elaine does the dance with the little kicks and the thumbs. “Sweet Fancy Moses.”:


3) Turk dances to Bel Biv DeVoe's “Poison”:


4) Robert Barone discovers he has moves:


5) Will and Carlton enter a dance contest:

July is Going to Kill Me

I wouldn't say I dread the month of July each year, although it's certainly the busiest month, sometimes moreso than the holidays at the end of the year. Lately, it seems like the beginning of each year, January and/or February, are the toughest. In 2008 I nearly lost my favorite cat. In 2009 I nearly lost my dad. “Nearly” is the operative word in both cases, but it was still a scary time. July isn't tough emotionally, but it is tough in terms of my schedule.

I think at its worst were the years in which my father and I played for a community band for his old high school. Starting the last week of June and going to the last week of July, we'd have two hour rehearsals every Tuesday and Thursday night, and concerts down by the water for the first four of July's Fridays. I enjoyed it, because although it wasn't a paying gig, it gave me the opportunity to read sheet music and play new songs, something I lost touch with after I graduated high school. But after I graduated college and got a full-time job, and started becoming more and more active with fire department bands and Italian festival bands, those four concerts and ten rehearsals began to take their toll. Some years we had to miss a rehearsal or a concert because it fell on the same day as one of our paying gigs. One Summer, the district discontinued the program due to budget cuts. The following year, when the band started back up, we didn't return, and haven't since. I enjoyed my time there, but it got to be too much. I was also seeing the younger generation come up, and felt bad that I always had the solo on Edelweiss. After a decade, it was past time to give someone else the opportunity to be in the spotlight.

This year, several factors are starting to give me that sense of being overwhelmed. My company offers two types of mailings along with our sweepstakes. In one, we sell magazines, while in another we sell an assortment of products. Magazine mailings are a lot easier for me to design and take a fraction of the time, and I've been fortunate to be assigned two or three in a row. But now, in my busiest month, I'm back on a product mailing, with all the additional photography and direction that goes with it. Throw in a few extra administrative meetings and some extra assignments, and suddenly I can't take as many vacation days as I could these last few months, or leave at a decent hour.

I've also been training for a race on July 28th, one I've only participated in twice before. It's only 3.5 miles, but since deciding last month to sign up, I've been trying to run a minimum of 5 miles a day. If I can get myself used to that, then the shorter distance will be much easier mentally and physically. I spend an hour on the treadmill every night, and my best distance in that time is 5.69 miles. Between leaving work late and extra time at the gym, many nights I don't get home before 9 PM. It's starting to catch up to me, but I only have to do this for a few more weeks.

And finally, overlapping work and working out is the fun stuff, my hobby/second career. I played a parade on the 4th of July as I always do, two miles that wasn't so bad compared to past years when it was almost 95 degrees out. This Saturday, I'm playing another parade, thankfully not far from where I live for a change, and likely the last gig of the year with that band. On Sunday, I have to catch a bus at 6 AM that will take me on my now annual journey to the Padre Pio Shrine in Barto, PA, where I'll be playing with one of my Brooklyn-based Italian groups. This Wednesday evening after work I have another gig with that same group, a new one in Queens that will supposedly go from 8 PM to 9:30 PM, and hopefully not much later. The next morning, I'm taking off from work as I have to be in Brooklyn at 8 AM for our annual July 16th feast, which will last until 2 or 3PM. Then it's back to Queens to the place we're playing at the night prior, where we'll perform again from 5-8 PM. On Friday, I'll then go back to work and catch up on anything I missed. I've been trying to work ahead, but I can't anticipate everything. I'll get a week to catch my breath before I have to be in New Jersey on July 26th with another Italian band, and then 2 days later is my big race.

Phew.

The good news is I was originally supposed to play on the 27th for another feast which unfortunately went to a different band this year, so I get a break. And August is light so far, with only 2 gigs, both falling on the same weekend. This weekend and the subsequent week are definitely the start of my challenges. My impeccable timing even has one of my IRA CDs maturing, so I have to get to the bank this weekend as well. And somewhere in there I'm going to mow the lawn here. And my Aunt is visiting from Florida so last weekend we had to mow the lawn and trim the hedges at my dad's lot in case she drove by there to check out their childhood property.

No, July is never easy. But I'm never bored, and it always goes by quickly.

My Sitcom Character Memorable Moments Five

In sitcoms, there are characters, and then there are CHARACTERS, those wacky breakout supporting stars who make the rest of the cast seem sane by comparison. With thousands of memorable moments to choose from, it's almost impossible to pick my five favorites, but these five certainly rank high among them:

1) Reverend Jim must have had....music lessons:


2) Cosmo Kramer is mentally challenged:


3) Jack Donaghy roleplays to help Tracy Jordan:


4) Joey Tribbiani's tailor is a very bad man:


5) “Slow Donnie” on Just Shoot Me:



“Chicken Pot Chicken Pot Chicken Pot Piiiie!”