Spoilers

I'm not going to ruin Iron Man 2 for anyone. It's a fun sequel that's on par with the original, and has several Easter eggs for sharp-eyed fans. Two are extremely obvious, although you have to wait until the very end of the credits for one of them. The pace is a little slow and uneven for roughly the first half of the film, but it definitely picks up and once you get where you're going, it's a wild ride. Most importantly, Robert Downey Jr. continues to own the role of Tony Stark. You can tell he's just having so much fun with the plot. And I liked how bits and pieces from the character's nearly 50 years of existence were integrated in to the film. It was hard at times to not turn to my friend during the film and comment on spies or boxers or political positions or drinking or anything else that was a reference or in-joke, but I didn't. I know to keep quiet during a movie, and unlike some people, I think I always have.

We almost didn't make it. I opted for some stupid reason not to buy tickets online ahead of time. I can't remember the last time there was a line or a show was sold out, and it eventually seemed pointless. At the last minute I considered it, but figured we'd get there in plenty of time. But when we arrived, the 8:30 show was sold out. There were still tickets for the 8, which was just starting, but the guy in the booth(thankfully) told us we'd only have front row seats. I didn't need to look up actors' nostrils for two hours. The next show at that theater wasn't until 10 PM, but that was sold out anyway. Despite some bad reviews from critics, people were going to this thing anyway. Popcorn flicks, superhero movies, and horror films are among the genres that fans really need to decide for themselves, because critics don't always get it.

So, the nearest decent theater was about ten minutes away and we had no idea what the times were. Worse, it was in a mall, and I knew what that meant even before we got there. There are a lot of kids at the mall on a Friday night, and they are loud and unruly. I don't remember being like that when I was a teenager. I don't think my parents even let me out after dark by myself. Kids have far too much freedom and too long of a leash to get into trouble. Still, this theater had a lot more show times and wasn't sold out, so we took the risk that the constant din in the food court amid boys in dirty clothing and girls in slutty clothing was not an indication of the theater conditions.

Unfortunately, there were a lot of annoying teens in the theater. There were parents with small children, who were the best behaved of the bunch. The teenagers were making dumb comments, laughing at their own jokes, and sounding way too confident in their stupid remarks. Was ever like that? Did I ever guffaw and throw popcorn and consider myself the center of attention? It continued well into the trailers, one kid in the row behind us more obnoxious than the others. My friend murmured through gritted teeth that he was ready to hit the kid. I gripped the handles of my seat after giving the half turn and full turn look of “shut the hell up”. When the movie started, they eventually quieted down, although there were a few points where someone must have uttered something because I'd hear some words and then a projectile laugh. It's when they say something and laugh at their own joke that's the worst.

At the end, everyone got up and started walking out. I stopped myself from shouting that there would be more, because I at least knew that much. I wasn't spoiled, but knew from experience from the first film that there would be something good. I kept my mouth shut though. Let them all leave. As the herd thinned, I could tell by the people remaining in their seats who knew, who knew we were in for one last treat. A few of the irritating ones stayed, but saved their commentary until after the bonus scene.

You know what I really don't get? It's one thing to talk, or text, or not mute your cell phone. You're immature and don't know better, or maybe you're just a jerk. Maybe you don't care about ruining the experience for someone else. I don't have to like it, but I get it. But aren't you there to watch a movie? It's not karaoke; you're not there to act like a star. You paid money for tickets, or your parents did, but either way you're presumably sitting in that seat because you want to see this movie. So when you don't shut up, you're not just ruining it for me. You're ruining it for yourself. Do you know what you just watched? Do you have full appreciation? Or is it a generational epidemic? Some people are just compulsive spoilers. I guess the moral of the story is to go to a later show, buy tickets in advance, and never, EVER go to a mall movie theater on a Friday night. I knew these things already; apparently I just needed a reminder.