Baby Steps

I'm not a “big picture” kind of guy.

Don't get me wrong; it's not that I don't have foresight. A discarded childhood dream to become a detective left me with a keen eye for clues. I tend to piece together small bits of evidence, run various scenarios through my brain, and often come up with accurate outcomes. I can read the writing on the wall and know when something big is around the corner. Envisioning is never a problem with my imagination; action is.

I remember a girl I had a crush on back in college, and some advice one of my friends gave me. “Baby steps, man, baby steps.” My problem is I get too far ahead of myself, and the big picture intimidates or exhausts me. The trick is to break down any insurmountable goal into smaller components. First do X, which isn't so bad, then Y, and Z will be out of the way before you know it. The advice didn't work out for me in that particular instance, partly because I took too long between steps and partly because I wasn't what she was looking for, but it was still a good philosophy.

My to-do list is so extensive because I see what I have to do, and if I'm not scared then I'm lazy. It's easy to get comfortable. Why change? Why shake things up, take risks, and do a lot of work? My life is exhausting enough between the hours I put in at the office, in gym, or with various bands. I like to relax and recover during the hours that are mine, whether I'm reading, surfing the net, watching movies, or just napping.

I guess it's not a bad thing when something comes along to motivate me and snap me out of my natural inertness. Sometimes it's a good thing, like an event or an invitation. Other times, it can be bad news, and even if it's something I could have anticipated it still hits me hard. My arms go numb. I can't swallow. A general nervousness seizes me, and I don't know what to do first.

Big changes and big tasks can be overwhelming, so after a healthy amount of distraction, maybe a trip to a beach to clear one's head for an hour, an action plan should be formed, with bite-sized steps. Otherwise, nothing will be done. At work, I actually type a list of things along with deadline dates, a tip TheGreek gave me a while ago. I was drowning in some added responsibilities a few years ago while he and other coworkers seemed to manage fine. That nervous feeling is a normal response to adversity, but it doesn't do any good. It has to be faced then discarded, or else obstacles will take forever to break through, if ever.

Sometimes the steps in a plan can seem like too much, and if so, probably are. In these instances it's best to subdivide. In Dragonfable, I decided to attain the top level in their arena section, having achieved the highest character level already and not having any other goals. There are twenty levels, and each level requires a certain number of trophies. The first one required only one, while the next asked for five, then ten, and so on. The highest level requires 300 trophies, made worse by the fact that a trophy is awarded after winning five matches. When I found out how many fights I'd have to win, I almost gave up. 2,256 trophies is a lot, but multiply by five and it's even worse. 11,280 fights? No way.

Still, I broke it down. I looked at the number of trophies, and decided to just win ten a day, which can be done in less than an hour while I'm watching a DVD, so I can multitask. Some days I did more. Now I'm on the verge of level 17, leaving a mere 825 trophies. I play more on weekends, so I can get about 100 a week. In two months, an impossible goal will be met. I realize this is an extremely trivial example, but applied to a career, or school, or dating, or any other area of life the philosophy is sound. Can't read a 1,000 page book? Read 10-20 pages a day, more when it interests you, and it will be a breeze.

Is failure possible? Are there things in life we can't achieve? Absolutely, but the first and most important obstacle is our own doubt or laziness. If we can't get past ourselves, we'll never get anywhere.