M.C.F.A.T. Volume XXVII Answers

Last week I posted the TWENTY-SEVENTH batch of the M.C.F.A.T., or Mysterious Cloaked Figure's Astonishing Test questions. Here are the answers you came up with:

Lorna.

B13.

And here are my answers:

1) What did/do you want to be when you grew/grow up?
I originally planned to be an architect, based entirely on my experiences with blocks, LEGO®, BILO, and my Erector Set.

I'd outgrow that phase by the time I was heavily into reading mystery series such as the McGurk series and The Three Investigators books. I loved the young crime solvers in those books, loved the notion of secret lairs and kids making a difference. I started carrying around a small magnifying glass everywhere, which I got beat up for in 7th grade and was told by the school's security guard that I should have known that would happen, running around like an idiot with the small plastic toy. Undeterred, I made a wooden sign for a room in my basement that read “Secret Service Detective Agency”. I thought I was Sherlock Holmes, though the only “mystery” I solved was in fourth grade when I claimed to have found a neighbor's missing cat. I wrote about it in an essay for a school assignment, but the teacher noted a disconnect between me hearing some rustling in the bushes in the woods behind my house, and the owners finding the cat on their own a few days later.

By high school, I was pretty heavily influenced by comic books and cartoons, and the doodles of superheroes in the margins of my notebooks began spilling over into the notes area. I had always tried to draw, as far back as elementary school when I admired classmates who could draw, and by the time I graduated high school I decided I wanted to draw comics professionally and be a famous inspiration to other young people. That dream evolved into graphic design and digital art as I realized in real life people need a steady paycheck and benefits. It's interesting how much I jumped around before settling on something realistic.

2) What's the biggest thing you've remembered that you hadn't realized you'd forgotten?
I'm sure that as soon as I answer this question, I'll remember something bigger, because if it's forgotten then I certainly can't write about it. But a week ago, when talking to one of my friends about the various parks and gardens on Long Island, I recounted a tale of taking my girlfriend at the time to an outdoor performance by Ray Charles, and then realized I hadn't thought of or spoken about that in well over a decade. The man was a legend, and certainly should have been mentioned when I was writing about my best concert experiences a few weeks ago. People had blankets and chairs and wine and cheese, and Mr. Charles was accompanied by his trio of female backup singers and a full band, playing under a tent in case of rain that thankfully never came. I'm very glad I had that experience, and sorry that I'd almost forgotten about it.

3) Is work performance directly proportionate to salary?
I think it shouldn't be, but it's often the case. How often do workers in fast food and other eateries forget a cheeseburger or some other part of an order, or make a sandwich the wrong way? Burger King corporate might boast that you can “have it your way”, but the staff doesn't always get that memo and I can't tell you how many times my mom has ordered a sandwich with no mayo for my dad, only to get home and find mayo on it. Sometimes a chicken sandwich will turn out to be a burger, and they're always confused when you don't order a meal by number. “Just the sandwich?!” is the incredulous question we encounter every time. In Subway, ordering a sandwich from the toasted menu does not guarantee that it will be toasted. I always have to remind them; they always get annoyed, and usually leave it in the toaster, or on the counter next to the toaster as they move on to the next person on line.

When I graduated college, I would say my salary was one fourth of what I'm making now. I worked just as hard back then, if not harder. I wanted to feel a sense of accomplishment, and to feel proud. I wanted to be rewarded for my hard work and effort, though at some companies the “reward” was often more work. I gave Burger King and Subway as examples, and some might say I'm expecting too much from people barely making minimum wage(and barely speaking English, which is a separate issue I'd be politically incorrect in criticizing and will probably be in trouble for just mentioning--I try to work past the language barrier, yet sometimes it's frustrating). But we all start somewhere, and I can remember climbing ladders in the boiling heat of Summer to paint rooftops while avoiding hornets, or running around at a gas station trying to help three or four customers at a time. It never occurred to me that, because I was making five dollars an hour or less with no benefits, I could slack off. I never think that I'm working for a paycheck, but that I'm working to do a job. I've never left an office at 5:00 PM because it was 5:00 PM. When I done with what I had to get done with for a particular day, that's when I can leave. I think my parents' generation had that work ethic, but more and more Americans today have shifted to a sense of entitlement, that they won't do certain tasks, or do them well if they don't get the compensation they think they deserve. That's not to say that sometimes they aren't right; my boss at the gas station once asked me to clean the restroom, and when I opened the door and saw the walls, floor, ceiling(!) and every surface but the toilet was “painted” with...well, let's just say that was my line, and I was refused. I thought I'd be fired, but he just got one of the other attendants to do it. Even though there are legitimate “You couldn't pay me enough to...” situations, the majority of us swing to the opposite extreme and don't do the jobs we're supposed to do.

4) How far would you go to escape?
On a recent episode of Chuck, Casey tells Chuck that it's easy to get out of handcuffs if one is willing to break one's thumb(which he later demonstrates). On last week's Terminator: TSCC, Sarah bites into her own thumb to get out of cuffs. Then there was that story a few years ago about the climber trapped on the edge of a cliff and starving, who would have died if he didn't cut his own arm off with a pocket knife.

In all of those situations, I think I would still remain trapped and/or dead.

SPECIAL BONUS QUESTION: Which part of my body is disproportionate to its counterpart?
My left thumb is shorter than my right, one of many mutant deformities.