11.30.2006

HottieZ

With apologies to my female readers, I may be getting a little sexist with tonight's post. In my defense, the question of “Who are your sexiest famous or semi-famous women and why?” comes from one of my female readers, so there. Now, on with the parade of babes, in alphabetical order:

Amy Acker:
Best known for portraying Winifred Burkle, this beautiful Texas-born actress quickly showed her range as she went from playing a mousy but brilliant Southern gal to the demon Illyria during her time on the series Angel. Her next recurring role found her playing a villain on Alias, the devious Kelly Peyton. One of my favorite shots of her on that show was her calmly striding through an office moments after firing a missile, as a burning helicopter falls past the window behind her. Rumor had it that she and some of the other core villains of that show would star in a spinoff after the series ended, but nothing ever came of it. Other than guest appearances on How I Met Your Mother and Supernatural, and some voice work on JLU as Huntress, her career's been relatively quiet, but I hope we'll see more from her soon.

Cameron Diaz
She's a hot blonde, and that should be reason enough. But she had a certain classic femme fatale quality in The Mask that I fell for as well, and when the hero, a shy awkward bank worker, wins her over, it was the fulfillment of every geek's fantasy. By the time she was dancing in Spider-Man panties in Charlie's Angels, she could do no wrong.

Eliza Dushku:
She's not the type of girl that I would go for in real life, at least given the tough characters she's portrayed on shows like Buffy and Tru Calling. She could clearly kick my ass, and would have endless reserves of energy to go clubbing all night while I'd rather have a girl I can cuddle up with on a couch and watch a good movie. Still, I like her attitude and her smile, and there's something attractive about an untamed lioness. Like most if not all of the women on this list, she probably wouldn't go for me anyway, but if The New Guy adopted that attitude, his movie wouldn't have been as good, and probably much shorter.

Jennifer Garner:
Does this one even need much explanation? In the last six years, were there many heterosexual red-blooded American males who weren't completely in love with her? She could hold her own in a tough situation as well as any of Dusku's characters, but had a softer, vulnerable side as well. Beyond Alias and Elektra, she even made me love a chick flick. Damn you, Affleck.

Heather Graham:
Yes, she played a rollerskating porn star, and a sexy sixties special agent in Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me. But what I really appreciate in this gorgeous blonde are her eyes. During her stint on Scrubs, I really noticed what wide, crazy eyes she has. Those are the eyes of a hot girl who's just a little bit off, possibly off enough to go for an overweight Italian guy that lives with his parents. Quiet, leave me my dreams.

Teri Hatcher:
As I made my way through the fourth and final season of Lois and Clark this past weekend, I was reminded of why I fell in love with her back in college. She was every comic geek's dream Lois Lane. She was pretty, but not as tough or emotionally guarded as Margot Kidder's character. It helped a lot that she lacked Kidder's smoker's rasp as well. She was sharp and confident as a reporter, but we got to see her insecure side as well, and the show did a great job of humanizing her. It's a shame this raven haired beauty was wasted in Tomorrow Never Dies. I lost interest after that, and I haven't seen one episode of her new show. I used to be obsessed with her. I even named a character after her in The Sims, but somehow she ended up marrying a character named Cameron Diaz and the game changed her name to Teri Diaz. How's that for too much information? We'll probably all sleep better if we forget I ever mentioned that.

Milla Jovovich:
I keep watching her display her agility and flexibility in bad movies, from my introduction to her in The Fifth Element to her more commanding role in Resident Evil. What she lacks in a chest she makes up for in curves, and a strikingly beautiful face. I was really torn watching Ultraviolet, because she was a visually amazing character in a visually amazing environment flipping improbably through a series of choreographed fight scenes influenced by comic books and anime. The conflict lies with her flat voiceover, the overall weak dialogue, and wisp of a plot holding the action sequences together. I also realized that the kid in the movie annoyed me because he was the same creepy kid from Birth, which I hated. I borrowed the movie from B13 though, so at least I didn't pay for a really bad movie that looked really good, in which she looked really good.

Keira Knightley:
When I sat down to compile this list, I made a rule that I wouldn't choose anyone born after 1984, no more than ten years younger than I. She was born in 1985, but I have to make an exception for this talented British actress who, like so many on my list, balances a softer side with a tough side in films like Pirates of the Caribbean and King Arthur. She played a tough American in The Jacket and an even tougher bounty hunter in the gritty Domino. This beauty has a lot of good roles ahead of her.

Evangeline Lilly
If I had to be stranded on a desert island, I could only dream of having someone who after a month of grime and sweat still looks ridiculously sexy. The writers have found a way for her character to have a shower or two over the last few seasons, but the makeup people should win awards for strategically placing dirt to accentuate her cheekbones.

Alyssa Milano
I feel like I grew up with her. When Who's the Boss? began, her character was something of a tomboy, a spunky Italian girl from Brooklyn. As the years progressed though, this boyish duckling blossomed into a hot swan, and I wished I had grown up with her and won her heart before better looking guys noticed her. I could never get into Charmed, but I do own a VHS copy of Embrace of the Vampire. She's definitely still one of the most beautiful women in the world, in my book.

* * * * *


Wow, it's late. If I had time to elaborate, additional mentions would go out to Reese Witherspoon, Natalie Portman, Nicole Kidman, Morena Baccarin, Kirsten Dunst, Selma Blair, Jennifer Connelly, Mía Maestro, Laura San Giacomo, Rena Sofer, Mia Kirshner, Denise Richards, Neve Campbell, Drew Barrymore, Judy Greer, Rachel Weisz, Jewel Staite, Ashley Scott, Jenna Fischer, Kate Beckinsale, Paget Brewster, Scarlett Johanson, Sarah Wayne Callies, Elisha Cuthbert, Audrey Tautou, Charlize Theron, Yvonne Craig, Dina Meyer, Winona Rider, Rashida Jones, Maggie Gyllenhaaland probably more I'll think of long after posting this. I had way too much fun with this week's topic.

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5 Comments:

Blogger Kelly said...

I even named a character after her in The Sims, but somehow she ended up marrying a character named Cameron Diaz and the game changed her name to Teri Diaz.

I'm betting someone had a Sims neighborhood with nothing but these hot ladies.

11/30/2006 10:38 AM  
Blogger SwanShadow said...

Note to self: MCF is a righteous dude, but don't let him invite the women. ;)

See, this is why we embrace a diversity of tastes, mi amigo. There's not a single person on your A-list who moves me even the tiniest fraction. Even though Alyssa Milano and I share a birthday. (I've had it longer.)

We don't hit too many more matches on your honorable mentions list, but I'll grant you a hearty "Aye!" on Jennifer Connelly (might be the most beautiful woman in show biz today), Drew Barrymore (a total freak, but undeniably cute in a goofy sort of way), Paget Brewster (if I weren't already a fan of Criminal Minds, I'd be one now that she's on it), Winona Ryder (a sentimental favorite -- she grew up in the town next door), and Rashida Jones (whose mom, Peggy Lipton, was also pretty hot -- at least for a blonde -- back in the day).

As the great Sly Stone once said, "Different strokes for different folks." At least I know that when you come over, you won't be pawing my Diane Lane DVD collection. :)

11/30/2006 8:23 PM  
Blogger kevbayer said...

Ooh! A hot chick post! Yay!

IMO:
Amy Acker - Cute (even as Ilyria).
Cameron Diaz - Way too frickin' tall and kinda dorky looking.
Eliza Dushku - hot.
Jennifer Gardner - just okay.
Teri Hatcher - hot as Lois Lane - now she just looks weathered.
Heather Graham - not very familiar with her.
Mill Jovivivavichich (sp?) - ugh! No thanks.
Kiera Knightly - yowzza - but she needs to put on a few pounds. I don't need to be able to count ribs.
Enageline Lily - not familiar with her.
Alyssa Milano - Eh, she's okay I guess.

Most the ones on the list could stand to put on a few pounds - see the rib comment above.

And for honorable mentions - the ones I like are: Natalie Portman, Nicole Kidman, Morena Baccarin, Drew Barrymore, Jewel Staite, Kate Beckinsale, Dina Meyer.

11/30/2006 8:49 PM  
Blogger MCF said...

Not "honorable" mentions; ADDITIONAL. I had something to say about all of them and like Jerry suggested this morning, I probably could have gotten a few weeks out of this. I had a whole thing in my brain about Just Shoot Me, Coupling, and Blind Justice and how Rena's this hot showkiller which is the only thing that makes me nervous about her being on Heroes. And Amy's at the top because I did it in alphabetical order; it would have been impossible to rate all of them.

I did forget Catherine Zeta, though I was most attracted to her back in the first Zorro. I also realize now that there was no mention of Salma Hayek. Like I said, I know I forgot a lot.

Thanks for the head's up on Paget, SS. I'll have to check that out. Last show I saw her on was Andy Richter Controls the Universe, and the last movie was The Specials. Loved her on Friends when Joey and Chandler were both fighting over her.

You don't watch Lost Kev? Evangeline is Kate on there. I guess I have younger tastes than you guys, but "Eh, she's okay I guess." for Milano? Really?

Jessica Alba. That's a HUGE oversight for me. Names are going to keep popping in to my head, I just know it. Like Tina Fey. And Nadine Velazquez, who plays Catalina on My Name is Earl. Aye Carumba!

12/01/2006 12:12 AM  
Blogger kevbayer said...

Ah Catherine Zeta and Jessica Alba - definite hotties!!

Nope - don't watch lost. Watch a few eps of the first season. It was good - I just don't have that much time to watch all the good shows that are out there.
That's why I haven't seen any JLU yet - but I've aquired it - so I will occasionally watch some of it.

I don't think me not liking Alyssa Milano has anything to do with her age... I think Hayden Paneterrie (sp?) from Heroes is hot, and she's only 17. And don't go getting all "that's illegal!" on me :-) The legal age of consent in Indiana is 16! :-) Yes, there are shades of "dirtbag" hidden within this mild-mannered exterior :-)

12/01/2006 6:53 PM  

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