T.I.L.T. Things I've Learned Thursday XVI

Here are yet more Things I've Learned Thursday, named for the day on which I share them, not necessarily the day on which I learned them:

* The answer to the question of ”What's the Worst That Could Happen?” is apparently “that movie”. Take four of my favorite comedians, put them in a low-budget comedy with the thinnest shell of a plot, and you end up with an hour-and-a-half DVD that takes me a week to get through.

* I had one of those “Whatever happened to...?” moments and found myself looking up Bridget Fonda. Now married with one son, she hasn't acted since 2003. Interestingly enough, her husband is one of my favorite composers, Danny Elfman. I did not know that.

* I was about to write a joke about how Danny Elfman is no relation to Jenna Elfman, but then I read that she's his niece.

* Nobody cares about or remembers what you did yesterday. Don't be like Al Bundy and live for those football trophies you won in high school; figure out instead how you can be a star tomorrow.

* “Metallica produce[d] videos for seventeen of the [Black] album's twelve songs.”
“Replaced by guitarist Kirk Hammett, [Dave] Mustaine went on to form his own successful and popular metal band, Winger.”
“Lars Ulrich has admitted that he stole the name Metallica from a fellow high school student who showed him a list of possible cool band names.
I learned a lot about Metallica from Darrell.

* Always check your fly before leaving the restroom. If you're feeling for your zipper as you're walking out into the hall, you might force a female coworker to quickly look at the ceiling. I had a...friend...who did that once...I imagine he was very embarrassed.

* It is not possible to build a sentient robot with an Erector Set, although that's a damn funny name for a kid's toy.

* The single most challenging thing to teach at an all-boy's Catholic high school is Ejaculatory Prayer, although I imagine the teachers in the coed Catholic schools invoked just as many guffaws if not worse. I think it would be difficult for adults to keep a straight face, let alone teenagers. It's probably why the term isn't used that often. Word meanings change in context, sometimes drastically.

* The easiest way to get a six-pack is not through sit-ups or any other intense exercise routine. Just go to the supermarket and buy one.



Blogger b13 said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

9/18/2008 2:58 PM  
Blogger b13 said...

I really hope you all realized that Mustaine did not form Winger... please tell me you recognized the joke... pretty please.

9/18/2008 2:59 PM  
Blogger b13 said...

oh, and you always check it on the way out... that way you know who's checkin' you out (how YOU doin'?)

So, was it the 19 year old intern or the 65 year old grandmother of three?


9/18/2008 4:54 PM  
Blogger Darrell said...

Thanks for the link.

No, Mustaine did not form Winger. Mustaine actually formed Mr. Big.

Thanks for the link and the promotion.

I thought Jenna Elfman actually married into the Elfman family? Like, to Brody Elfman or something? I should look it up and post a link, but I'm lazy.

Jenna Elfman is hot in that weird, could kick our asses, seven feet tall Amazon warrior way.

9/18/2008 5:57 PM  
Blogger MCF said...

I thought Bodhi Elfman was her brother?

And yes, Darrell is correct about Mr. Big. Of course I know he didn't form Winger. Mustaine's the one who wants to be with you sweating bullets.

9/18/2008 10:52 PM  
Blogger MCF said...

I stand corrected; Bodhi is her husband and she married into the family. Yet another thing I learned Thursday!

9/18/2008 10:56 PM  

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